Sexologist reveals the most secret thoughts of the stronger sex.
Although men are considered the strong half of humanity, they still sometimes face their fears in the intimate sphere. What are these fears and how to avoid them, says a sexologist.
Milana Sokolova
Relationship Specialist, Sexual Psychologist at Secrets Sex Education Center.
Decreased libido
Some time ago, it was believed that the lack of desire in men is directly related to erectile dysfunction or problems with ejaculation, that is, with purely physiological reasons. Modern research has shown that in most cases, a decrease or lack of libido hides psychological difficulties. A man may have a lack of sexual desire due to fatigue at work and stress. With what do they usually come to see a sexologist? “Everything is fine with my wife in marriage, but somehow I don’t want to have sex at all…” To the question “What do you want?” men answer in different ways: some do not want anything, others are carried away by a career or other things that have nothing to do with sex.
Also, one of the most common reasons for the lack of love desire is the monotony in sex. When sexual relations stop giving pleasure, become mechanical, turn into a boring routine, a man does not have the idea of going to bed with his beloved. That is why sexologists say how important it is to constantly bring something new into intimate life..
Sexual impotence
All men are afraid of impotence, this is a fact. In his sexual organ, he sees proof of his existence and the basis for being recognized as a man. And, therefore, they fell in love. This is how male psychology works. Of course, this increased attention to the penis makes them very vulnerable. At least once in their life, each of them experienced sexual impotence, the moment when it is impossible to maintain an erection, in 90% of cases due to psychological reasons. But men always dramatize such moments, feel shame, start having sex less often. As a result, fears only grow. What to do in such a situation?
Sometimes you can resort to the help of drugs and the support of a psychotherapist, but it is better to work with the emotional component. A man should concentrate on how to please a woman. Convince her that it is not her, restore trust in sex and enjoy each other again.
Fast discharge
According to statistics, every third man suffers from premature ejaculation. This is the most common male sexual disorder and one of the main fears. It can arise with a new partner, when you just did not have time to agree, adjust to the rhythm and needs of each other: seven minutes is enough for him, and she hopes for twenty. Or due to irregular sexual intercourse, which increases the man’s hypersensitivity.
The more a man worries about the risk of premature ejaculation, the more he strains and accelerates its onset. If a quick orgasm is a feature of the body, then a man is probably aware of his capabilities and accepts himself as he is. At the same time, premature ejaculation happens to absolutely everyone, and you should not pay attention to a single case.
Penis size
All men are afraid that a woman will find their penis small. Men are so worried about the size of their penis that modern medicine offers them various ways to increase the length and diameter of the penis..
It should be noted that being small at rest is completely normal. After watching adult films, many men begin to doubt themselves and become disappointed in their own parameters and skills, comparing themselves to the hero from the screen. It is definitely not worth getting hung up on, because modern sexologists have long proven that penis size does not matter.
Premature pregnancy
An adult thinking man, just like a woman, always thinks about the responsibility he bears when he goes to bed with his partner. Sometimes this turns into a stage of paranoia, and the man can delay the moment of intimacy due to the fear of committing himself to the woman. What to do? Of course, take care of reliable methods of contraception.